I thought the life you gave was real,
It was an exciting life to live.
My eyes are now wide, I've been deceived,
That life was never yours to give.
Fool me once, the shame's on you,
Fool me twice, the shame's on me.
Make me a fool more times than that,
And my death is what you'll see.
All you do is drag me down
Into the depths of deep despair.
My brain's confused, my mind is numb,
You create damage beyond repair.
Every day I awake the same,
The sun is out, yet I see rain.
Tiny little hurricanes
And twisters fill my brain.
The man I knew is far and gone,
Was he ever really there?
Or was it just a dream I had?
Why does life seem so unfair?
You tell your truth, I hear your lies,
All the answers you never say.
My soul is slowly leaving
With every stupid game you play.
I don't know why I stick around,
I can't handle more abuse.
The kids, my house, no money,
There's always some excuse.
Drowning in my tears at night,
All the pain I've tried to hide.
He says that he's not cheating,
Deep down, I know he lied.
I hate myself for staying.
How could I be so dumb?
I'll do anything to leave this life.
I've gone completely numb.
He's always been unfaithful.
I've never been enough.
I want to leave this situation.
I know he's going to make it tough.
I'm scared to talk or disagree.
I've seen just how far he'll go.
First, his anger, then the fighting,
And all the violence he will show.
I know he never loved me,
Though he'd say it every day.
He never really meant it.
He just wanted everything his way.
I don't know how to be with someone
When the tables are always turned.
Deceit with no compassion,
And all our bridges he has burned.
My brain you beat, my heart you bleed,
My soul you stole from me.
You made me weak so you were strong.
I'm not who I used to be.
I have no support; I'm all alone.
This little game you think you've won.
This life I had, I used to love.
Thanks to you, I will have none.
How could I fall for your deceit?
Every lie, a web you spun.
Playing Russian roulette with my life,
How could I let you hold the gun?
You cut me down so you'd stand tall,
My self-esteem, you have destroyed.
Word by word, you broke my soul
With the vulgarity you've deployed.
If you only knew what goes on in my head,
But you are too blind to see.
I feel my heart is slowly dying,
As you have taken everything from me.
I thought my mind was strong,
Until you got into my head.
Now my thoughts just don't make sense,
As I can't get out of bed.
My mind knows what I have to do,
But my heart just won't cave in.
I'm trying to get away from you,
So I can live again.
I'm losing my breath; I gasp for air.
I can't breathe or feel my lungs.
Walking around on eggshells,
As if I weigh 500 pounds.
Now I lie here in the darkness,
As my life will soon end.
I wonder what my life would have been like
If you could have actually been my friend.
